Spring 2011 road race - BigBird flaps to victory!

8 September 2011

The TKM Spring 2011 season kicked off with the handicapped road race on the Kew Boulevard this morn.

Despite multiple protestations from every man and his dog over the handicaps, WobbleBlob's handicapping prowess shone through as the 3 lap race finished with all bunches coming together on the second half of the final lap for a tight finish.

Is a style reminiscent of the Luis Leon Sanchez's of the pro cycling world, the Hairy Eagle kicked hard and fast to sprint to a magnificent victory in the uphill push to the line.  He had time to savour his victory, look around, wave to the laydeez in the GSA and provide a suitably low-key victory salute to his adoring fans.

Asked by a heaving press contingent after the race what he thought of his performance, the big bird was quite reflective, "yes, well, I think I rode a smart race today.  It helped that alot of the big hitters were wreaked by in-fighting and cheating, but I was presented with an opportunity and did what any A-grade GROAT would do in the same circumstances. I'd like to thank my two key sponsors - Slattery and Slattery's Gutz. Without their continued support and motivation to succeed, none of this would be possible."

The podium was completed by Mutley and Chicken to mark the start to what is sure to be another exciting season.  Other highlights of the race included:

• King's breakaway in the final lap to what he thought would be certain victory, dragged to within 500m of the line by Woody but unable to seal the deal with his own talent
• WoofWoof doing a mountain of work to drive the scratch group to eventually catch everyone up the road, ably assisted by Woody, Llama and Fleizen
• WoofWoof cheating his ass off by drafting a car to bridge to the final group - CHEATS NEVER PROSPER!
• King's team mates Doma and Paddy giving their all for their undeserving leader
• Efforts from the likes of Squidley, Stroidy and Farmz who sacrificed themselves for the better good
• the mighty NothingCanStopTheWobbleChopper for his organisation and 'fluid' handicapping style.

Come on Spring!!!

The King's Men is a registered race team based in Melbourne. It grew from a small seed planted out on Beach Road Melbourne and has turned into self sustaining movement.  The group is made up of bunch of individuals who don't quite fit into the ways of the everyday world and generally are socially retarded, but together they have a common bond and purpose.  That purpose is to simply ride.  

Click around and see what TKM is all about. Check out the rider profiles and the TKM Cup standings. Pay homage to past TKM Champions like the Big Butcher, The Redneck Hick, The Hairy Eagle and The Greyhound. Listen to a story from the Fisherman. Tip the next winner of the next Shittest Bloke in Melbourne (hint: it's likely to be the Eagle).

TKM revolves around fierce but friendly internal rivalry both on and off the black top as well as being involved with racing of all types involving pedal power.  Go to any race and you're likely to spot someone from the green machine in attendance whether it be at the pointy end of A grade of the back end of D grade (although the later we tend to tease).  TKM is a tight knit group of buddies that takes the anger out of cycling and chanels that energy through the pedals instead.

Can you join?  Check out the TKM rules and find out.  But like a good golf club the waiting list is long as the intent of the TKM train is to keep the carriages to a minimum and therefore keep the ride, fast, fun and most importantly safe.  Unlike virtually all group rides, TKM is proudly accountable for its actions and will remain to be so.